Aishiteru Kara
by ReitaLOVE818
Summary: A mostly Miyavi x Kai fic, but it is a continuation of my story DiSoRdEr and mostly runs parallel to it. Basically, it's part 2 of a trilogy, so read part 1 first. First published in late 2008-early 2009 on DA.
1. Chapter 1

His almond eyes were closed as he tried to keep focus; he had to concentrate, concentrate, concentrate. The music flowed through his headset. Only a few feet from the mixer, Miyavi was taking a good listen to his latest single. He set the headphones down. "Nope, let's do it over. The whole thing!"  
>It had been a few days in the studio already, but Miyavi wasn't feeling satisfied with the recording sessions. He ran a hand through his hair and let out a long, exasperated sigh. There was most definitely something missing from his life, but what was it? The man had fame, money, he could take home anyone he wanted, and he had more lollipops than Enric Bernat could shake a finger at.<br>He toyed with his lip ring, chewing on it lightly as he returned to the sound booth. He watched the other musicians scurry to prepare for more recording as he picked up his acoustic guitar and began tuning it once again. Today would be a long day for Miyavi…  
>After the recording sessions were completed for the day, Miyavi went back to the rental property set up for him. He invited his long time friend Maya over, and it was there that the two made dinner and chatted casually for a few hours before Maya passed out on the couch and Miyavi went to the bedroom. It was then, while he was lying in bed, that he realized what one thing he desperately needed in his life- someone to lie by his side each night, someone to care for him when he was stressed, someone to love.<br>The next day, Miyavi had decided to take his lunch break at one of his favorite Western style restaurants. His was leaning back in a corner booth, taking in the dim lighting and quiet atmosphere when he noticed someone was staring at him. The young star was used to it, but the look in this stranger's eyes wasn't the usual look of admiration or longing. Rather, the stranger seemed fear-stricken. This reaction to his presence was mysterious, considering the fact that Miyavi was used to squealing fangirls and things of that sort. It was in Miyavi's naturally curious nature to approach this stranger, to take that risk, and to find out what he was really all about.  
>Miyavi stood, his neck craning at an odd angle so that he could see this stranger who had chosen to sit upon the tatami mats laid out on the floor on the other side of the room. He approached the other man calmly, but when he went to speak a goofy nervous grin poured onto his face and he somewhat mumbled, "Hello, I'm Miyavi. Pleased to meet you." Instead of bowing he held out his hand in a western manner.<br>"What are you doing? My boyfriend will kill you if he sees you anywhere near me. But since you just gave me your name, mine's Ruki." Miyavi didn't know it quite yet, but meeting Ruki would become very important to Miyavi's future happiness.

At this time, Ruki had been dating Reita, although it was being kept under wraps because the GazettE wasn't sure how it would affect their album sales as a fledgling band. Miyavi was already gaining fame in the Indies scene and had become a member of PS Company. Ruki tried introducing Miyavi to many different Japanese men, but it seemed that Miyavi wasn't finding that connection with any of them. First, there were members of Undercode Productions and other members of PSC that Ruki tried introducing him to, such as Riku, Ishi, and Nao. Although Miyavi and Nao had gotten along best out of the group of bachelors, he just didn't have that exact "thing" Miyavi was looking for.  
>As time passed, Miyavi began to feel more and more stress mounting. Everything was piling up; the upcoming album release, tour, the scores of random interviews and performances he would have on Japanese television, magazine photo ops and commercial spots. The closer it got to the upcoming album release date, the more depressed and irritable young Miyavi got.<br>Ruki could see all of this going on, and both he and his boyfriend Reita tried to spend as much time with Miyavi as they could. Unfortunately, the GazettE was off to do their first US tour, and so Miyavi was alone once again. He went through the motions, letting every mundane thing in his life distract him from the true pain he was feeling.  
>When the GazettE returned from their US tour, a few things had changed. Ruki and Reita were no longer dating, and Reita had brought home some American girl. This wasn't of much interest to Miyavi at first, until he went and visited the flat for the first time since the tour.<br>Miyavi knocked on the door with his right hand; an unwrapped and pre-licked lollipop was occupying the other. Apparently, Ruki, Reita, Aoi, and Uruha weren't home. When the door opened, Kai had answered. Kai had a warm-hearted expression on his face. His dark eyes were darting back and forth between Miyavi and the bowl of cookie dough he had been mixing. Although his hair was a mess, he was in his pajamas, and he was wearing a stained up apron, Miyavi found himself instantly speechless. The young man just shook his head at Kai and blushed. "Gomen," he managed before taking off full speed down the steps. Kai merely frowned and closed the door before returning to his perfect chocolate chip cookies.  
>Later that night, Miyavi was enjoying his evening off. He had gone to one of the local host clubs; there was a particular host he liked to see whenever he was crushing on someone because this host always seemed to give the most stable love advice. Miyavi strolled into the club and took his seat in the usual booth after checking in and paying the up-front fee.<br>The host he liked so much happened to be Yukihiro. The two had some sake while glazing over light conversation and skipping forward to Miyavi's newest crush. Miyavi explained it like this: "I went to the GazettE's flat today, and Ruki wasn't home….but I was so happy because the only person home was this beautiful dark-eyed angel baking cookies. He was so polite, but instead of talking with him or even giving him my name, I froze up and fled the scene!"  
>Yukihiro's head tilted to one side. "This new guy you like…he's a member of the GazettE, ya know? Please take care of him for me."<br>It struck an out of tune chord in Miyavi that Yukihiro would switch to such a formal tone in the middle of their conversation. Yukihiro was never this serious. Miyavi scratched the back of his head. "You close friends with the GazettE?"  
>Yukihiro laughed. "Just the drummer. He's my little brother…but I suppose you didn't know that since us hosts usually don't mention family while we're on the clock."<br>Miyavi's eyes popped wide open. "He's your brother? Sumimasen; I had no idea! I will do my best to take care of him-if we ever get to be a pair. I don't even know his name yet." Miyavi chuckled nervously.  
>"His name is Kai," Yukihiro said gently. "I can make sure you two get to see each other often, if that is what you would like. I've known you long enough that I know you wouldn't dare hurt my little brother." Yukihiro winked at the end of this statement, showing that this was just a jest, not a threat.<br>When Yukihiro had said he would make sure the two would get to see each other more often, Miyavi didn't think that he'd end up seeing Kai that night. Yukihiro called Kai and said that Miyavi was going through some hard times and needed company, and Yukihiro claimed his schedule was full and he couldn't get Miyavi in tonight. He also asked Kai if he would visit him and make sure he's alright.  
>The rapping of knuckles on the door pulled Miyavi from his drawing. He went to the door, unknowing and uncertain of who was behind the layers of wood and steel. When he opened it and saw Kai standing there, he figured that as soon as Kai recognized him he would think something strange was going on, but if Kai did remember his face, he showed no sign. Miyavi invited him inside in a very formal manner and asked him if he'd like some refreshments.<br>Kai's smile widened; although he found it somewhat charming, the over formality of Miyavi was making Kai want to laugh. "This guy's nuts," he thought. He took a seat on the tatami mat in Miyavi's living quarters, figuring the sooner he got this over with the better.  
>As the evening moved forward, the more Kai learned about Miyavi, the more interested in the man he was. Kai knew the guy was an old friend of his brother, and so whenever he could read Miyavi's feelings of sorrow, Kai would have to fight back tears of his own. When all was said and done, Kai left Miyavi's house deciding that a second visit would be necessary, but Kai was thinking that his interest in the other man was more like that of a counselor's interest in a certain subject.<br>As far as Miyavi goes, he felt a little refreshed. Kai seemed willing to spend time with him…but the uncertainty was tearing Miyavi apart. He didn't know if Kai had any genuine interest in him as far as dating partners go, or if he just thought that Miyavi was mentally deranged.  
>Miyavi was curled up in his bedcovers that night, tossing and turning a little more than usual. If Kai wasn't attracted to Miyavi, he didn't know what he was going to do…Miyavi began playing with the idea of setting himself on fire in his dreams that night…<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

The members of the GazettE were sitting around the kitchen table in their flat, trying out Kai's chocolate chip cookies. Although the guys were all focused on the treats, Kai was the only one who didn't seem too interested. His mind was focused on something else at the moment.  
>Aoi threw a chunk of his cookie and it whizzed past Kai's head, striking Uruha in the face. Of course this irritated Uruha, and he sent another piece flying right back. The cookie fragment brushed past Aoi, clipping Ruki in the shoulder.<br>Suddenly, Kai just stood up and went to his room. His bandmates stopped their cookie tossing and watched him walk off. "Where's he going?" Reita asked, "He hasn't even tried a cookie yet." As Kai went to his room, he almost bumped into Reita's girlfriend. She just gave him a look of concern as she passed him.  
>Once in his room, Kai pulled out his cell phone and began dialing his brother. Since Yukihiro worked in the evenings as a host, Kai was waking him by calling him during the day. "What do you want?" Yukihiro asked with a stretch and a yawn which could be heard quite well over the phone.<br>Kai replied after a brief hesitation. "I want to see Miyavi again. Tonight."  
>Kai could hear Yukihiro shifting as he was looking for his address book. "Already? I wasn't expecting you to become so attached to him this quickly. Let me give you his cell number and you can call him. He's recording a new maxi single so he may not have the time to see you tonight…his number is 914-555-1981. Go ahead and tell him you want to see him yourself. If you need to talk to me, call after four." With that, Yukihiro hung up on his brother so he could go back to sleep.<br>Kai pouted. He didn't know if he had it in him to make that phone call; it would take quite a bit of courage. Yet before he realized what he was doing, Kai had pressed the buttons on his phone and was listening to the ringing of Miyavi's cell phone. It rang once, twice, three, four, five, six times….and then the answering machine came on. "Hey, what's up? I'm Miyavi, so go ahead and leave me a message and I'll hit ya later." After a second there was a beep.  
>Kai mumbled a bit, and then swallowed hard before leaving his message. "Anou...this is Yukihiro's little brother, Kai. Eeto…I was just wondering if you were going to be busy later, uh, tonight. This is my cell number so feel free to call me on it. I don't have any plans…thanks, bai bai."<br>Miyavi happened to be in the shower at the time of Kai's call. They had finished the final mixing of his single just a few hours ago, and Miyavi was actually going to call Yukihiro after his shower. He went to his cell phone, his hair still wet and a towel was wrapped loosely around his waist. When he flipped it open and saw a random missed call, a small frown developed as he failed to recognize the number. Miyavi decided to dial voicemail. Miyavi heard "one new message" then the usual beep. There was a moment of silence, followed by a sharp inhale. Before he knew who it was, Miyavi could tell the person was nervous. When Miyavi heard Kai's voice, he squealed loudly, loud enough to make his neighbors scratch their heads in annoyed wonder. When he learned Kai wanted to see him, Miyavi didn't even bother to listen to the rest of the message. Instead, he just called the number back.  
>The phone only rang twice before Kai picked it up. He hadn't left his room since before he'd called Yukihiro, and he'd kept his fingers crossed the entire time that Miyavi would call back. "Moshi moshi?" he answered nervously.<br>Miyavi contained a giggle. "Whatcha doin?" he asked, sounding reminiscent of a small, curious child as he said it.  
>"Nothing," Kai said into the phone softly. Kai was holding the phone between his face and his shoulder; he had to wipe the sweat off the palms of his hands and onto his shirt somehow.<br>"Well, I am getting a little hungry. Wanna go out for some food, maybe catch a movie?" Miyavi bit his lip so he wouldn't laugh. The man's towel had accidently fallen, it was sitting around his ankles.  
>When Kai heard a small snicker escape Miyavi, he was puzzled. "Yeah I want to. But what's so funny?"<br>Miyavi grinned. "I'm naked," he said calmly, like it wasn't a bit deal.  
>Kai's face went beet red. "Umm…well I have to get ready. Where and when do you want to meet?"<br>Miyavi cleared his throat. "Anou, how about we go to koushoku ramen. Be there by five."  
>Kai nodded for some reason. "Yeah, see you then."<br>Kai wandered out into the living room of the flat, his face still fairly red from talking to Miyavi. The rest of the GazettE stopped what they were doing and began staring at Kai.  
>"Oooo… why's little Kai kun's face so red?" Ruki asked before tapping Kai on the forehead.<br>Kai simply answered, "Who wants to help me fix my makeup? I have someplace important to go tonight and I have to get ready."  
>Uruha raised his hand to help with makeup, Aoi ended up picking out his clothes, Ruki styled his hair, and Reita gave Kai some breath mints and a good luck charm that he'd had for many years. By the time the band had fixed Kai up, it was almost four. "Oh crap, I have to go!" Kai scrambled out the door as quickly as he could.<br>It was a long trek across a large chunk of Tokyo, and Kai most certainly didn't want to be late. As Kai was taking the shinkansen, he realized that there was a strong possibility that this couldn't even be counted as a date. Miyavi just invited him as an acquaintance. But Kai was glad that he was putting so much effort into this, just in case…

Miyavi reached the ramen shop first. He smiled and brushed a few wild strands of hair out of his face. With cat-like agility, he made his way through a mild crowd, past the tables of customers, and to the counter. He hopped up on a stool.  
>One of the workers gave him a strange look. "You gonna order something?"<br>Miyavi nodded. "Yeah, but I am waiting for my friend to show up. Do me a favor when he shows up will ya? Give him a hard time. I'll tip you extra."  
>Kai showed up maybe fifteen minutes after Miyavi did. It took him a few minutes to get through the people, he kept bowing and saying things like, "gomen ne" and "sumimasen". He hopped up on the bar stool next to Miyavi, but he was too nervous to say anything. Miyavi had already ordered his ramen, so the worker served it to him now. When he served Miyavi's ramen, he stopped and looked at Kai.<br>"Oh wow, what's a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?" The worker leaned over the counter and he smiled at Kai, winking playfully.  
>Kai's face went scarlet and then pale, and he began to shake a bit. "Actually, I am here with him," he replied weakly, pointing at Miyavi.<br>The worker put his hands on his hips. "Stop lying to me. It's obvious from the way you're shaking…you think I'm attractive. But whatever, if you want to waste your life by spending it alone, that's your decision. I'm just here to serve you ramen. What kind do you want?"  
>Kai made his order, but it didn't stop there. When he was served his ramen, the shop worker came out wearing only some kind of lacy freakish man-panties. This was embarrassing for the worker, but once he realized it was Miyavi who was footing the bill, the Miyavi, he decided he would do all he could to get a ridiculously large tip.<br>At this point most of the customers in the restaurant were staring, and poor Kai was having to sit there and take it. He took the ramen from the worker cautiously, and stuffed his mouth with noodles so he didn't have to pay attention to what was going on around him. He finished the bowl quickly, wasting no time getting the heck out of the ramen shop. Miyavi threw a wad that contained maybe ¥50,000 onto the counter before he chased after Kai.  
>"Kai san, wait!" Miyavi's long, cheetah-like legs caught up with Kai quickly. "Are you alright?" Deep down, Miyavi was laughing, but he had to pretend to be concerned.<br>Kai shook his head. "What the hell was wrong with that guy? I haven't had anyone treat me like that ever. That isn't what stardom is like, is it?"  
>Miyavi shrugged. "How about we get your mind off of that…wanna go to see a movie still?"<br>Kai nodded, and the two got on the shinkansen once again.


	3. Chapter 3

After that evening, Miyavi was quite busy working on plans for a new project, and so he didn't see Kai for a while. Miyavi thought about Kai every day, but he felt he needed to keep focused in order to perfect the songs he working on. Miyavi was looking forward to playing at Jrock Revolution in California. Miyavi had played in the United States before, but he knew that none of his fans would be prepared for the little trick this maverick had up his sleeve…  
>Miyavi returned to Japan in between his practice sessions and the recording dates that had been set. Miyavi had only been home for about twelve hours and was suffering from jetlag when he got a phone call from Reita. Miyavi answered, trying to sound as tired as possible; he really didn't feel like being bothered.<br>"Hey Miyavi, are you busy right now? There's kind of an emergency going on right now and we all really need your help." Miyavi could hear that Reita's voice was worried and rushed.  
>"What's the emergency?" Miyavi asked flatly. "Did Kyo chew up Aoi's underwear, or did Uruha's hair fall out…"<br>"Listen up!" Reita barked into the phone. "My girlfriend has gone missing. She hasn't been home all day, and she isn't answering her cell phone. Can you come help search?"  
>Miyavi was looking quite a mess still and didn't want Kai to see him like this, but he reluctantly gave in. "Alright, I'll be right over." Miyavi closed his cell phone, hoping the click rang on Reita's ears.<br>When Miyavi made it to the GazettE's flat, he saw Reita was sitting at the kitchen table, his face buried in his folded arms. Ruki had a hand on Reita's shoulder, trying to comfort him. Kyo, Kaoru, Aoi, Uruha, and Kai were also in the room. Miyavi walked to the far end of the table and surveyed the situation. At this point, Miyavi was beginning to feel worried. "So why are we all just sitting here? Let's do something," he finally murmured.  
>Kai looked up at Miyavi. He said, "I can't believe she hasn't returned; where do you think she is?" As he was asking this, Miyavi pulled out a giant rainbow-colored lollipop and unwrapped it.<br>Miyavi turned to Kai and Kaoru, took a lick of his giant rainbow-colored lollipop, and said, "Let's check Harujuku-ku, ne?"  
>Kaoru and Kai joined Miyavi during their search. Miyavi began to feel nervous; he hadn't seen Kai in such a long time…As a result, Miyavi began skipping up and down the streets ahead of Kaoru and Kai. Kai didn't really mind it; Miyavi was doing a good job of handing out flyers and covering more ground.<p>

Miyavi was bopping along looking and he bumped square into Satoru. "Oh," Satoru winced, "be careful where you step…What brings you out here so late anyway? Coming to the host club?" Satoru eyed Miyavi. He knew if he didn't do something to distract Miyavi, the group would catch on quickly. Of course, diverting Miyavi's attention wouldn't be a hard thing to do.  
>Jamming his hand into his pocket and pulling out a photograph, Miyavi handed Satoru a picture. "She's missing. Have you seen her today?" Miyavi's eyebrows furrowed a bit; he thought, "What the hell is Satoru doing out on the street this time of night?" It seemed really odd to Miyavi.<br>Satoru's lips curled. "Why yes, I saw her earlier. She was with Maya. They seemed pretty playful…like they might be involved. They were heading for Maya's apartment."  
>Miyavi's lollipop fell to the ground. "She, they….no…really?" Miyavi was visibly upset. "Thanks, Satoru," he said quickly, and grabbing Kai and Kaoru by the wrist, Miyavi began running down the road immediately. As they were running, Kai tried to remember if Reita's girlfriend had even met Maya; Satoru's words weren't fitting in Kai's mind, but checking Maya's place might be a good idea. They ran for ten minutes straight and stopped in front of Maya's apartment, gasping for breath.<br>Once they found out from Maya that he didn't even know Reita had a girlfriend, Kai put together that Satoru was a big, fat liar. The next place to go was the host club. Miyavi felt happy that he got to see Yukihiro at work without paying him for once. That was always a problem with befriending a host, wasn't it? Kai consulted Yukihiro and discovered he thought Satoru was out of town, and the two brothers narrowed down Satoru's whereabouts.  
>So yet again, Miyavi, Kai, and Kaoru were running through downtown. They reached the Hilton, found where Satoru was staying, and prepared for an attack. Miyavi was running down the hall of the third floor yelling, "Pow! Right in the kisser!" Miyavi was only trying his best to lighten the situation up some.<br>Kaoru hushed Miyavi as they approached room 304 and knocking gently, Kaoru said in his best lady voice, "Room Service."

The trio could hear rustling around and some clinks of metal. After almost two minutes, Satoru opened the door and welcomed them in. Cautiously, they brushed past the wide-eyed man in his fancy suit. Satoru tried to flee, but Miyavi chased after him and bit his shoulder like a trained attack dog would. While Satoru was wincing in pain, Yukihiro punched him with a right hook to the jaw which sent him spiraling to the ground. Yukihiro brushed his hands together as a demented grin blanketed his face. "Well, that was easy."  
>Kai searched the hotel room and found Reita's girl curled up, handcuffed, and badly wounded in the bathtub. She looked barely conscious, so kaoru called for an ambulance. Yukihiro and Kaoru decided to go back to the flat and report that Reita's girl had been found and guide the others to the hospital. Miyavi and Kai waited until the ambulance arrived and took Reita's girl. By this time, Satoru was wiggling in the hallway still where Yukihiro had decked him, and when the cops picked Satoru up and dragged him off, everyone felt relieved.<br>Miyavi and Kai rode together on the subway to the hospital. "What a sick, sick man," Kai whispered under his breath.  
>Miyavi still picked it up. Looking at Kai, he smiled, "I am glad there are guys on this planet like us."<br>Kai looked at the floor. Us. That word made Kai feel a little nervous. Maybe he was reading too deeply into Miyavi's statement. "I'm glad, too," he agreed, his voice cracking slightly.  
>Later, in the hospital's waiting room, Kai was sitting quietly reflecting over everything that had happened in the past few hours. Miyavi approached him, scratching the back of his head nervously. He forced a nervous smile and produced a rainbow-colored lollipop. "This is for you," he said shyly. Kai took the lollipop and was prepared to thank him, but he disappeared.<br>Miyavi had headed for home. He didn't want to cause any trouble for Kai, and he was still feeling quite tired from the flight home. "I'm starting to do it again…" he thought, "I'm acting like an idiot. Why can't I just openly ask Kai to be mine? What's my problem?"  
>Maybe, just maybe he would confess his love for Kai. When? Tomorrow. "Yeah, tomorrow," Miyavi whispered aloud. He got dressed in his pajamas, and marked tomorrow on the calendar as, "ashita" and put little hearts around it. Miyavi then grabbed his favorite plush toy, Sunaaguru san, and wormed his way under the comforter. He already made himself a promise; tomorrow would be different.<br>On the other side of town, Kai wasn't sleeping at all. He kept wondering why Miyavi gave him the lollipop. "Why me? Why does he think I'm so special?"


	4. Chapter 4

Miyavi woke up and rolled over, looking at the alarm clock next to his bed. "It's ten already?" he asked himself with a stretch and a yawn. Sitting up, he thought for a moment before stumbling down the hall and to his kitchen for a late breakfast.  
>As he was looking for a box of Crispin Puffs Cereal, Miyavi noticed a Peaches n' Cream flavored Chupa Pop on the counter. "Maya must have left it last time he was over," he thought. Miyavi opened his fridge, pulled out the milk, and set the cereal and milk on the kitchen counter. As he opened a cupboard to get a bowl, he noticed there was a small slip of lined paper strategically set in between the stacks of dishes. Miyavi looked around in confusion. "What's this?"<br>Before even reading the paper, Miyavi went to his front door. Opening it, he found that he had forgotten to lock it last night when he came home. Unfolding the small slip of paper as he made his way back towards the kitchen, he squinted and tried to make out the shaky, sloppily-handwritten kanji on the paper. Miyavi let out a small gasp and dropped the paper, watching it flutter and turn as it hit the floor.  
>Kai had beaten Miyavi to the punch. The piece of paper read, "deito ni ikemasen ka", or, "Will you go out on a date?". Beneath it, in small lettering, it also said, "denwa o kakette kudasai", or "please call me". Miyavi ate his Crispin Puffs quickly, only slowing down periodically to be sure he didn't choke.<br>Miyavi grabbed his cell phone and called Kai. After only two rings Kai answered. "I found the slip," Miyavi ejected; he wasn't one to beat around the bush.  
>Kai responded immediately, "un….well? Have you thought about it?"<br>Miyavi smiled. "There was nothing really to think about. I actually wanted to ask you out today. I was getting ready to eat breakfast when I found the slip. Where will we go on our first date?"  
>Kai had already planned this part as well. "I have reservations for us at Kuchizuke. They're for tonight, so I hope you can come. Be there at seven."<br>"Alright, I will. See ya." Miyavi didn't have to be there for another eight hours. What was he to do all day?  
>Miyavi decided to make another phone call. When the answering machine came on, Miyavi frowned but left a friendly message. "Hey Maya, my house is open for visitation until about five. If you wanna come over and play some videogames, that'd be cool. Feel free to invite Aiji and Saga."<br>While he was waiting to see if Maya would call back or show up, Miyavi hopped onto his laptop to check his email. "Junk, junk, junk…" When nothing of interest came through his normal email, he logged into the email address that fanmail from was rerouted to. After reading a few of those, his jumpy tendencies kicked in and he logged onto his myspace account and left a brief blog entry. He wrote that he had a surprise for those who were buying tickets for Jrock Revolution and posted a more recent photo of himself. Afterwards, he closed his laptop and bounced over to his front door excitedly; there had been a knock just seconds before.  
>Expecting his friends, he was instead greeted by a delivery man who gave him a bouquet of mixed flowers. When Miyavi looked lost, the mailman said, "He said you'd know who it's from." Miyavi nodded; he did indeed know who sent them. Miyavi put them out on his coffee table. He was rearranging them by color when Maya practically kicked Miyavi's front door in, Aiji and Saga following along with nervous looks on their faces.<br>When Maya jumped on Miyavi and almost knocked him to the ground, Miyavi cried out, "You guys didn't let him have caffeine, did you?"  
>Aiji sighed. "He left our watchful eyes for one minute. The next thing we know, he's chugging an energy drink and a coffee at the same. I'm hoping the video games will keep him focused and off us."<br>As Maya bit Miyavi's shoulder, Miyavi winced and said, "I hope so, too. Damn it, Maya, not so hard! I have a date tonight and I have to look decent!"  
>At those words, Maya let go, his butt plopping onto the hardwood floor with a thud. His eyes grew round like a begging puppy. "But Miyavi, you can't do that to me, can you? What about us?"<br>Miyavi tossed the guys wireless game controllers. "That ended a while ago, you spazz. What you need to do is find someone who will take care of you, who knows what to do when you're all buzzed on caffeine. Hell, I'll bet you're even closer to finding your soul mate than you think." Miyavi looked at Aiji and winked before throwing himself onto his couch.  
>Kai's day was a little more productive. Uruha went with Kai to Harajuku-ku; it was decided that for Kai's first date that he'd had in a very long time he should be wearing a brand new outfit. The shopping centers had always been the one environment where Uruha would act more alert and lively; he was the band's pro at finding the best deals on all the best clothes.<br>"We need to find an outfit that doesn't over-exaggerate your lean figure. A healthy-looking boyfriend is a sexy boyfriend," Uruha declared as he dragged Kai along. "We have to find something that accentuates the subtle curves in your body just enough so that Miyavi notices them. There should be the greatest emphasis on your strong points." Uruha pointed at Kai's flat stomach. "Oh, and you have to feel comfortable and content with the clothes you are wearing, like they're an extension of your true self."  
>As they entered a store, Kai thought to himself, "Uruha takes clothes way too seriously."<br>"What's your style?" Uruha called back to Kai, holding up a bright green skirt that screamed oshare kei in one hand and a black velvet military-style jacket that seemed more Victorian gothic visual kei in the other. Kai just smiled and wandered through the racks of clothing; he would only take a closer look at items that stood out to him.  
>After venturing through three stores, Kai finally found some clothes that he liked. "Hey Uruha, what do you think of this!" Kai strutted out of the dressing room. He stopped and turned as if he were on the catwalk in one of Tokyo's hottest fashion shows.<br>Uruha looked Kai up and down. He was wearing a thin, white button down shirt with a black jacket and some slacks that were tight on his hips but flared out along his legs. Uruha pouted. "Nuh-uh! That will not do. Let me get something together."  
>Uruha made Kai purchase an outfit with numerous accessories and forced Kai to go home. "I have arranged for a special hair stylist to be doing your hair today," he said with a calm grin.<br>When Kai got home, it was Ruki who yet again was going to be fixing Kai's hair. He started by adding in some extensions, then, with a massive can of hairspray in his other hand, he began fluffing Kai's hair. Once he finished, Ruki looked at the clock. "Well, Kai, it's almost six. You'd better get going if you don't want to be L-A-T-E!"  
>Miyavi had to stop playing video games at about five so he could take his shower. However, he told his friends to wrap up the gaming while he was in the shower, so they got a few extra minutes. It took all of Aiji and Saga's strength to pull Maya away from the game console and out the door, but they left just before five-thirty. Miyavi picked one of the newest nice outfits he'd received from a photo shoot, fixed up his hair and makeup, and made it to the subway just after six.<br>Since they were coming in from two different directions, they wouldn't see each other until they made it to Kuchizuke. Both men were hoping that they wouldn't mess up tonight. Miyavi figured he would probably say something stupid, and Kai thought he might accidentally spill wine on his shirt. The night most certainly wouldn't be one soon forgotten…


	5. Chapter 5

Kai made it to the restaurant first. He walked inside and went to the host. "I have a reservation tonight; the name's…I think Rei chan said he put it under his last name, so…Suzuki." Kai had been too busy freaking out last evening to actually make the phone call, and so Reita had done it for him.  
>The host looked at his list. "Alright…and you have one more coming." The host led Kai to a small table in a secluded back corner of the restaurant. "May I ask who I am seating with you?"<br>Kai blinked. "Yeah, his name is Miyavi," he whispered very quietly. The host nodded in understanding. The host then brought Kai a glass of water and asked if he would like to wait for the other man. Kai nodded yes, and the host returned to his post, waiting for Miyavi to show up.  
>Miyavi strolled through the doors casually maybe three or four minutes later. He would have made it to the restaurant before Kai had he not been chased down an alleyway by rampant fangirls just down the street.<br>When Miyavi made it to the table, Kai stopped swirling his water glass and looked up. His face reddened, and he chirped, "Hi." It was moments like these that Kai found his nerves to be overpowering.  
>Miyavi simply nodded in Kai's direction, unsure of how to reply. He set a small box on the table before taking his seat.<br>"What's that?" Kai asked, wondering why Miyavi brought a box to the table. Was it a present?  
>Miyavi grinned widely. "My dinner. Or, part of it, anyway."<br>Kai huffed, "What do you mean? What is it?"  
>"Pizza rolls. I want to have sautéed green beans with them. And I am going to tell them to arrange the pizza rolls all fancy on a little plate and have them drizzle some zig-zag pizza sauce pattern on them and garnish it with a dash of oregano. Neat, huh? Oh, and what are you getting?"<br>Kai thought the whole point of going to a five-star restaurant was to eat their food. "Well, I was going to have their American-style meatloaf."  
>The waiter stopped by suddenly, introduced himself, and asked them what they wanted to drink. He said he'd be right back with their apple juice and chocolate milk.<p>

As soon as the waiter left their table, Miyavi noticed a slightly irritated look on Kai's face. "What's up?" he asked sincerely.  
>Kai took a short breath. "It's just…you. You're…."<br>"Eccentric?"  
>"Childish." At this point, Kai's eyes had shifted downwards; he was looking at the table, staring at it as though it were the table his words had been directed towards. Kai knew that he himself was a bit over-the-top, but Miyavi sometimes crossed that line and became an annoyance. It only took a moment to realize that he had, indeed, messed up the evening. But, he had done something worse than spill wine on his shirt.<br>Childish? Miyavi may have been a radical, but he most certainly knew when it was appropriate to wear furry slippers and bring frozen food to a restaurant, and when it was not. He had reasoned that because Kai was not the chef, there would be no harm in bringing pizza rolls. Maybe Kai just wasn't ready to spend so much time with the man who lived to break tradition. If Kai were making dinner, Miyavi would eat it, and even if he didn't like it, he would pretend to, just to please Kai. Right now, however, Kai had upset him.  
>"I'm not childish," Miyavi droned quietly, "What's childish is you judging me. You barely even know me." Miyavi stood up, and, pushing his chair in, he left the restaurant, leaving the box of pizza rolls on the table.<br>Kai sat there for a while, stunned. Eventually, he uttered, "shit" and grabbed the box of pizza rolls, taking them home with him. Maybe after he cleared things up, Miyavi would want them back. And if not, then Kai would just have to see for himself what was so good about these pizza rolls.  
>Later that evening, Miyavi was lounging on his sofa. He was trying so hard not to think about Kai, but Kai's presence was permeating his thoughts, making him want to curl up in a ball and make his thoughts disappear. There existed only one remedy to Miyavi's racing mind.<br>It had been a long time since Miyavi had had to revert to drugs, but this was an emergency. He dug through his dresser, throwing pairs of socks and undergarments onto the floor. "Where is it?" he whined, still unable to forget about how he left Kai just sitting alone in the restaurant.  
>Finally, he found what he was looking for-a small paper joint filled with はっぱ. He scurried to find a lighter, and jumbling with it a bit, he lit the joint.<p>

Miyavi had started smoking not long after Gagaku came out. The stress that made his mind run fleeting in all directions became unbearable. The ADD medications his doctors tried to put him on made him lifeless, thoughtless like a zombie. On medication, he could not think and therefore, could not create music.  
>He remembered talking to Tatsurou one evening, and Tatsu said he had the perfect slowdown for Miyavi's rampant thoughts.<br>"Here's what I do," Tatsurou said, holding up a blunt. "I am still a little spastic sometimes, but this helps keep me under control."  
>Miyavi nodded and took the blunt from Tatsu. He took his first hit, coughing as the smoke infiltrated his lungs.<br>Tatsurou grinned. "Don't worry; it gets easier."  
>And so for three years Miyavi had smoked whenever he was alone to keep his mind from wandering. He stopped because one of his ex boyfriends dumped him when he discovered Miyavi would get high.<br>But Miyavi wanted to forget all of that now, and so he took a long drag on the はっぱ, the essence of it filling his lungs and relaxing him almost instantly. It only took a minute or so for him to forget about the seemingly irreparable damage he had done that evening, his mind shifting from his past to….to….sea monsters.  
>For some reason, Miyavi's home transformed into a giant lake, and although it was really his new, unnamed kitten crawling along the floor, Miyavi saw the lochness monster.<br>It was large and angry, a black watery beast with fangs and eyes glowing red. Its tail was long and pointed with daggers, its fins were large like a killer whales', and Miyavi could tell one thing about the creature-it was hungry.  
>"Leave me alone!" Miyavi shouted as the beast swam closer.<br>Miyavi climbed atop his bed. "GO AWAY!"  
>Miyavi had no idea it was actually his kitten, trying to snuggle up to his owner.<br>Once down from that high, Miyavi cried the hardest he ever had.


	6. Chapter 6

After the failed date, Kai stayed in his room all the next day, failing to come out for any reason. The rest of the GazettE was mildly concerned, but did nothing. They figured Kai's moping would come to pass eventually.  
>Early that evening Yukihiro called, and it was the first call Kai decided to answer all day. "What do you want?" he asked bluntly, as he was staring at his bedroom ceiling.<br>Yukihiro cleared his throat. "Can you come over? It's urgent." Yukihiro saying something like that without explanation meant it had to be serious. He never asked a favor of someone without telling them all of the finer points of a situation.  
>Kai said, "I'll be right over," and hung up his phone, threw on a scarf, coat, and shoes, and marched out the door, not caring that he was still in his pajamas.<br>It took him maybe twenty minutes to show up, which meant he had to run some of the way to make it in that time. He knocked with determination; short quick raps of his knuckles on the door expressed his desperation.  
>Yukihiro jogged to the door, opening it and ushering Kai in. Yukihiro's eyes seemed to say that there was something deathly wrong. "What is it?" Kai cried out pensively.<br>Yukihiro said something he thought he'd never have to say to his little brother. "Go to my room. Now."  
>Slightly confused, Kai made his way to his brother's bedroom. Opening the door, he saw a figure sitting in under the dim lighting on the bed. Kai's face contorted, expressing slight irritation and confusion. "Miyavi, what are you doing here?"<br>The singer looked up at Kai, and a flood of tears was dominating his features. He choked out, "I'm so sorry for abandoning you."  
>Abandoning him? Kai looked over at the shadowy figure. What was he supposed to do now? "It's not your fault; I was being so hard on you." Kai decided it would be a good idea to take a few steps closer, shuffling his feet against the hardwood floors as he moved.<br>Miyavi turned and, facing Kai, he wrapped his arms around him tightly. Kai let one arm rest on Miyavi's hip as the other one patted the top of his head. "It's my fault for being such a てめえー".  
>Miyavi tried not to giggle at Kai for saying that, but instead he just tightened his grip on the other man. He looked up at Kai, with large, round, begging eyes, and asked a vitally important question. "Are we official yet?"<br>Kai hesitated, but only to go over the facts. They hadn't even kissed yet, and they had gone out for the first time and it ended poorly. Was he willing to work with this man and see if their love would indeed bloom? Kai ran a comforting hand through Miyavi's hair. "Yes, we are."  
>Kai kneeled down onto the bed so that he could reach and pressed his lips tenderly against Miyavi's. It would be a challenge dating Miyavi, but challenges were nothing new to Kai, or any member of the GazettE, for that matter. Kai pulled away, took Miyavi's hand, and lead him out to the living room.<br>Stopping in front of a grinning Yukihiro, Kai bowed. He led Miyavi out the door and took him back to the GazettE's flat. Kai wanted the rest of the band to know his new status.  
>He burst into the front door, Miyavi following close behind. The band was playing a simple round of poker when Kai interrupted them. "What is it, Kai?" Ruki asked in a slightly agitated tone before he looked up and noticed Miyavi was with him.<br>Kai could feel Miyavi slip a lollipop into his hand as he was about to answer. Kai considered asking Miyavi what he was doing, but decided against it. "Miyavi is my boyfriend now."  
>From that Kai received a few nods of approval, and Uruha suggested they party…which sounded typical, considering the man's love of sake. Kai looked around the room, and felt the need to ask. "Hey, where's Reita?"<br>Aoi answered the question. "Well, his girlfriend is still in hospice, and we all know that Reita doesn't want to spend any time out here with Ruki while he's feeling stressed…in case he relapses."  
>Ruki pouted at Aoi before looking back down at his hand.<br>Kai nodded. "Can I play next round?"  
>Ruki looked about the room. "Yeah, I can sit the next one out. I think I lost this round, anyway. My hand sucks."<br>Uruha couldn't help but say it…"I thought it was your mouth that did that."  
>Ruki tossed his hand onto the table. "I can't stand you guys sometimes!" He marched out of the room and into his bedroom.<br>Miyavi stole Ruki's chair and had Kai take a seat on his lap. "What's with him?" Miyavi asked.  
>Uruha brushed a few golden locks out of his face. "Ruki's just being a little boy about Reita having a girlfriend. I think Ruki still has some strong feelings for him. The poor guy just needs a new boy toy."<br>Since Miyavi wasn't actually playing, they handed him the stack of cards and made him dealer. After maybe five minutes, they heard Ruki's bedroom door open. Then, they heard Ruki go up to Reita's door and knock on it. Without a response from Reita, they could hear Ruki enter the room anyway.  
>Reita was lying in his bed, stomach down. He was facing the window behind his bed, watching the wind whisper through the trees' branches and birds hopping from branch to branch. "It's beautiful, isn't it, Ruki?" He hadn't bothered to turn and face Ruki.<br>Ruki took a few paces closer to the bed, so that he was standing next to it. "Yeah, it sure is." Reita slid over a bit so that Ruki could take a seat next to him, and Ruki did so without having to be asked.  
>Reita rolled over so that he was belly-up now, and he looked up at Ruki. "I can see it in you every day. Every time you are near me, or when you're talking to me…you miss us."<br>Ruki looked down at his ex-lover's figure, trying not to say his next words too loudly. "I know, but I can't help it! I feel so alone now, even with you here."  
>Reita finished the statement. "Because I'm not yours, and vice versa. I know." He grabbed Ruki and pulled him down so that they were lying next to each other. "If I would have known that you felt this strongly for me from day one, things would be quite different right now. And I am sorry we can't be together due to executive orders. Maybe one day we can switch labels, and be with someone who understands that love is one of those things that cannot be dictated by a record company's contract."<br>Ruki sighed and rested his head on Reita's chest. He knew the way Reita felt about his girlfriend, and he knew they'd be together for a long time, if not forever. Ruki was forced to sit at the sidelines and cheer his friend on, although he would prefer to participate in the game.  
>"Whatever makes you happy, I'm all for it," Ruki whispered. It was true, but at the same time, he was hurting quite badly. Ruki choked back some tears and snuggled in more.<br>Back in the living room, Kai threw down his hand. "Royal Flush, for the win!"


	7. Chapter 7

Kai was asleep, curled up in a ball when Miyavi finished playing cards. After Kai had gone to bed, Miyavi was no longer dealer and he joined the game. Although he lost each round, he enjoyed getting to spend time with the GazettE's other members.  
>Miyavi planned to just come in and say goodbye to Kai, but when he leaned in to give his new boyfriend a kiss on the forehead, Kai subconsciously wrapped his arms around Miyavi. Miyavi was very careful to roll Kai over and climb over his boyfriend so that he could lie next to him without disturbing him. Miyavi's back was to Kai, and Kai's arms were wrapped around him so tightly that he had no choice but to just fall asleep where he was, as he was.<br>Kai woke up first. He went out to the living room, but he took a few paces backward to Reita's room. He blinked hard, rubbing his eyes to make sure that what he was seeing was reality. Ruki was lying in Reita's bed. Ruki was wrapped up in sheets, and Reita was lying behind Ruki, facing him with his arms around Ruki's waist. The sheets only covered Reita from the hip down…from the looks of it, Reita was nude. But was Ruki? Kai couldn't tell.  
>Kai stumbled back into the living room, still in a slight shock. He sat down and began thinking, "Shit! What do I say to Reita's girlfriend when she comes home from the hospital? Do I tell her anything? If I don't tell her, I need to make sure this doesn't happen again…but how?"<br>Miyavi came out of Kai's room, feeling disgusting for still wearing the same clothes he had been in the night before. He could tell right away that Kai was pondering something. "What's up?" he asked lazily, plopping down onto the couch.  
>Kai looked at his boyfriend. "How do I blackmail both Ruki and Reita in a way so that they never sleep with each other again…and Reita's girlfriend can't suspect anything." Kai took a seat on Miyavi's lap and let the other wrap his arms around him.<br>Reita woke up before Ruki, and he was feeling hungry. He made it out to the living room, all early morning smiles until Kai glared at him with piercing eyes and said, "I know what you did."  
>Reita blushed, "Oh, you didn't hear us did you? I'm sorry; we were trying to be quiet and…" At least he was being man enough to admit to his crime…<br>Kai grinned. "If you guys do that again, and I find out, I'm telling your girlfriend. Maybe I should tell the record label too; get Ruki's contract terminated."  
>Reita's face turned to a scowl. "You wouldn't dare!"<br>Kai pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. "nine one four…." He was pressing the buttons, actually dialing the office. He stood up and began walking to his bedroom. The phone only rang twice at the office. "Yes, this is Kai."  
>Reita was down on the carpet, scooting along behind Kai on his knees. "Please, please, please don't…"<br>Kai mouthed the words, "you promise?" Reita nodded.  
>Kai then said to the office lady, "Just wondering if you or anyone there has seen my wallet. I've misplaced it again. Feel free to call if you find it." Really, Kai's wallet was in his room…<br>Kai returned to Miyavi's lap, pleased with his results. Ruki came out of Reita's room a few minutes later, stretching and yawning. "What's up?" he asked sleepily.  
>Reita looked at him sadly. "I'm sorry."<br>Ruki's eyebrows furrowed. "What's wrong?" Reita led Ruki back into his room, but this time, just to talk.  
>Kai decided to leave the flat, going back to Miyavi's place. Once there, Miyavi took a shower, and Kai realized it was getting to be late in the morning, so he made the pair brunch. Stretched out across the table was an assortment of foods, including French toast, sausage, bacon, orange slices, yogurt, with coffee and milk to drink.<br>When Miyavi came out of the bathroom and saw the food, his jaw dropped. "You made all this?" He grabbed Kai in a tight embrace. "You're so sweet, Kai." He kissed the other's forehead before taking a seat to enjoy his brunch.  
>They ate in silence, well….there were little to no words. Miyavi was making plenty of noise; the scraping of silverware against plates and Miyavi's fervent chewing could have been heard clear down the hall of his apartment. Kai ate quietly, making as little noise as possible.<br>Miyavi ate with speed, having consumed two platefuls of food in twelve minutes flat. He put his plate and fork in the sink promptly and returned to his chair, deciding to keep Kai company as he was finishing his food.  
>Miyavi watched Kai with contentment until his cell phone began ringing. "I'll be right back." Miyavi scurried off to his room to answer his phone without bothering Kai while he was eating.<br>"Hello?" Miyavi said into the receiver.  
>"Hey Miyavi, it's me, Maya."<br>Miyavi smiled. "What's up?"  
>"You know I still love you." He said it without emotion; had Maya taken his medication that morning?<br>"You do huh?"  
>"Yeah."<br>"Well, you never showed it while we were together."  
>"I didn't know how…"<br>Miyavi tried not to laugh. "But you do now?"  
>"Yeah."<br>It was the mix of mood stabilizers, anti-depressants and anti-psychotics talking, and Miyavi could tell. "Listen, we'll talk more about this later. I'm with Kai right now."  
>"Your new boyfriend?" Maya's voice sounded scared, and perhaps like he wanted to cry but his medications were preventing him from doing so.<br>Miyavi hated it when Maya took his medications. "Yeah. But I'll call later, alright? Bai bai."  
>"Bye."<br>When Miyavi returned to his kitchen, Kai was finished with his breakfast and was clearing the table. Kai looked so happy and at ease doing housework, as if he was born for it.  
>"Who was that," Kai asked brightly.<br>"Oh just Maya…..he's been a little upset lately about something." Miyavi averted Kai's gaze and continued to help him.  
>Kai could read Miyavi like a book. "He's just going to have to move on. The experience could help him grow into a better person, if he'd just let it."<br>It was then that Miyavi realized that Kai was mature beyond his years. Maybe it was what Miyavi was looking for, someone to compliment his own immaturity…was Kai the one for him?


	8. Chapter 8

Kai was having some fun on this morning; he was at the room the GazettE was renting out much earlier than the others so that he could have some alone time with his drum set. He was playing with the passion and energy that only Kai could display.  
>During his practice, Miyavi came to the building and found the room Kai was in. Kai stopped practicing for a moment to greet him. Miyavi came over to hug Kai, grinning. "You know, you spend more time with that drum set than you do me."<br>Kai quirked an eyebrow. "Is that so?" He wrapped his arm around Miyavi's waist and nuzzled Miyavi's shoulder. The two had been dating for a week and a half now, but it seemed that everything was moving along quite quickly.  
>Miyavi took the affection as a sign. He craned his neck so that he could purr into the other's ear, "I have something special in store for you tonight." That one statement made a successful practice session impossible for Kai.<br>The entire time Kai was practicing, Miyavi was on the other side of the sound booth, his eyes locked on the other as a predator watching his prey, waiting for the perfect moment to pounce.  
>After an hour or so, the other members of the GazettE began to arrive, unpacking their equipment and settling down to start the day's session. As Ruki was performing a simple microphone test, he went to replace the mic on its stand…and he dropped it.<br>This made Uruha giggle. "You did it again, Ruki! That was like the fifth time. Whatever are we going to do with you?"  
>Ruki shot an angry glare at the other. "Shut up," he grumbled before testing the microphone again, just to be certain he hadn't broken it.<br>Miyavi was contently teasing Kai from afar when he was interrupted by a girl sitting next to him. "Oh, it's just Reita's girlfriend," he thought mildly, musing at the thought that maybe Kai was more innocent than her. But that would be resolved tonight, and Miyavi returned to giving Kai seductive looks from the other side of the sound booth.  
>Once the proper tunings were made, the real fun began. With four clicks of Kai's drumsticks, music began pouring into the room. It stopped not long after it began, however.<p>

"What the hell was that!" Aoi asked loudly. Apparently, Uruha's guitar was tuned a few steps too high. Well, more than a few. It was soon discovered that what had seemed apparent wasn't so much. Someone had replaced one of his effects pedals with screamer pedal, just to be a jackass. But who was it?  
>Reita left the sound booth, shutting himself into the bathroom so that he could get a good laugh. "Oh God, I can't believe Uruha didn't realize the pedals were switched." He was heckling and having a good time until Kai entered that bathroom.<br>Kai marched right up to Reita, pouting as he wiggled his finger. "You are so awful sometimes Reita."  
>Reita snickered. "That's what you guys get for depriving me of Ruki. I know it's been like four days, but damn this sucks!"<br>Kai shifted his weight onto his right leg. "What about your girlfriend? Don't you care about her?"  
>Reita sighed. "Yeah, I love her. But she's not like….Ruki….in bed." Reita scratched his head and gave up on explaining it.<br>"Well of course! Her and Ruki are two entirely different people from different cultures and are of opposite genders. You can't expect her to act anything like Ruki unless you train her to be."  
>Train her to be? The idea had never crossed Reita's mind. "Thanks Kai," he said, pulling Kai into a light embrace. "I'll give it a shot."<br>Reita and Kai returned to the practice area. Ruki was out smoking a cigarette, Uruha was checking over all of his equipment again, and Aoi was looking over a piece of sheet music. Kai looked over at the glass and sighed when he saw Miyavi licking his lips lustfully at him.  
>Kai spent the rest of practice divided between music and his boyfriend. Although he was playing all the right rhythms, he wasn't putting his usual charisma into it. It didn't take long before the rest of the band caught on.<br>They stopped playing briefly in the middle of "Agony" to address Kai's lack of concentration. "We can't have a half-hearted drummer," Aoi stated firmly, "or else the entire sound just falls apart."  
>Kai laughed. "I'm not half-hearted in the least bit, now am I Miyavi?" Of course, Kai's boyfriend shook his head, an indication of a negative response.<br>"Well," Reita said jokingly, "maybe we should stop for the day and give the couple some time to get this mess through their system." By 'this mess' Reita was talking about the couple's obvious lust. However, he didn't mean for the rest of practice to actually get cancelled.  
>They rode the shinkansen back through town, Miyavi's arms wrapped loosely around Kai's waist as Kai rested the back of his head against Miyavi's chest. The whole time Miyavi was whispering sweet nothings into Kai's ears, grinning with delight when Kai would close his eyes and sink further into Miyavi's body.<br>Somehow, they were the last ones back to the flat, but it didn't bother either of them at all. Miyavi picked up Kai and carried him through the flat slung over his shoulder like a potato sack. He used his foot to push the door open, and once inside Kai's room, Miyavi tossed his lover onto the bed and returned to the door, closing and locking it securely.  
>Kai was shaking like a wet puppy; he had very little experience with dating….and no experience whatsoever in bed. Miyavi, however, was well-versed in making love since he had toured in several countries and slept with dozens of people, both male and female. But it wasn't until he noticed Kai lying on his bed shaking hopelessly that he realized that he would be Kai's first.<br>Miyavi took a moment to think. He didn't want to ruin the other's perception of sex; it seemed that taking one's virginity was always a harshly critiqued task, and Miyavi would have to be the perfect lover if he wanted Kai to have a positive view of lovemaking.  
>Miyavi's lips curled up into a playful smirk. The man never demanded anything less than perfection of himself, and tonight would be no different. Miyavi took a few slow, steady steps to the bed, and, bending down at the waist, he planted a tender peck on Kai's forehead.<br>"Don't worry Kai, we'll take this nice and slowly…if this is what you want." Miyavi gave Kai another gentle kiss on the cheek.  
>Kai nodded and reached up, his lips connecting with Miyavi's. Once Kai laid his head back down, Miyavi could see the look of contentment forming on Kai's face. Miyavi climbed onto the bed slowly, until his body was parallel with Kai's, and he began pressing his lips against Kai's neck, making sure to occasionally nip the other's skin ever so gently.<br>Kai made soft half-whimpering noises each time Miyavi's lips came in contact with his flesh. Although Kai wasn't sure what to expect, he was already growing quite impatient…


	9. Chapter 9

Miyavi snickered as his lips brushed against Kai's. He was using his arms to hold his upper body above Kai, purring as he let his crotch brush against Kai's thigh. "Do you like this?" He asked playfully.  
>Kai's body was tensing at Miyavi's contact, and he found himself blushing at Miyavi's question. "Yeah…" He wanted to say more than he could…he wanted to tell him everything he wanted to hear. But Kai's head was spinning; he thought he wanted for Miyavi to take him, but he wasn't so certain. He tried to shrug it off as first time jitters.<br>Sitting up so that his legs were on either side of Kai's narrow hips, Miyavi began tugging on the bottom hem of Kai's shirt. Kai understood and complied, pulling his torso upwards so that Miyavi could slip the garment off his lover and onto the floor.  
>Miyavi stopped for a moment to revel in the vision of his lover's bare chest, shoulder, arms, and stomach. All of it looked so enticing to taste, to touch…to destroy. Oh, but he would have to save that kind of roughhousing and molestation until Kai had a little more experience under his belt…<br>Miyavi took Kai's wrist and pulled the other's hand up towards his lips and kissed gently. His expression turned to one of somber worry when he could see nervous sweat already building up under Kai's arms.  
>But Kai didn't say anything; he really didn't want Miyavi to stop just because he was afraid. Kai blushed and drew his hand away from Miyavi, instead letting it run along his own stomach…just to tease Miyavi a little and distract him from Kai's nervousness.<br>It didn't take Miyavi long to realize what Kai was doing. Kai took his hand away and replaced it at his side as Miyavi's hand glazed over Kai's navel. Miyavi moved his hand and replaced his mouth, kissing Kai's smooth skin. His hand crawled upwards to Kai's nipple, and he began to rub it gently between two fingers.  
>Kai wasn't quite sure what was going on, but he did know one thing- everything was feeling good. He began whining and gasping for air; Kai felt like he was drowning and yet, he was enjoying it as well…<br>Miyavi was grinning fully now, but he stopped for a moment because the room was beginning to feel too warm for him, and he removed his own shirt now, tossing it to join Kai's on the floor. He sat for a moment, and after taking note of how overheated Kai was beginning to look, with his flushed cheeks and damp skin, Miyavi removed both his pants and Kai's, throwing them across the room as well.

Miyavi paused. Kai looked a bit sick, like he might become ill. Kai could read Miyavi's eyes and he mustered up the courage to say…. "Don't stop."  
>Those two little words were all Miyavi really needed. He grabbed Kai's left leg by the ankle and decided to work his way upwards now, taking slow, steady licks up Kai's leg, past his knee, along the insides of that other man's thighs.<br>Kai felt quite embarrassed; now that they were only in their boxer shorts, Kai knew that his own hardness was clearly visible and unmistakable, full and erect under that thin layer of cotton.  
>Miyavi took note of it has he could see it standing out of the corner of his eye, and he licked up Kai's thigh until he reached the boxers. They were becoming a problem, and didn't really flatter Kai's thin, lithe body, and so Miyavi removed those also. When he threw them they landed on Kai's dresser.<br>Finally Miyavi could see Kai's member in its full glory. It seemed Kai was an easy turn-on, as most virgins are; his length looked pink and was already weeping a little from anticipation of being touched.  
>Miyavi smirked. "Would you feel more comfortable if I take my boxers off, too?" Of course, asking this was meant as more of a tease than anything else.<br>Kai nodded. "Yes, please…" He said it so politely that it made Miyavi giggle.  
>Miyavi wasted no time removing his own boxers, and when he pulled them off he sat up and twirled them on the end of his finger for a few rotations before letting them fly off to the corner of the room. Now Miyavi could really make Kai cry out.<br>Miyavi purred and looked at Kai; Miyavi was sitting up on his knees, knees apart feet together. He took his own hardened member and jerked it in his hand a few times, rather teasingly. "Do you like what you see?" He asked wickedly.  
>Kai took a deep, shaking breath. He couldn't handle it. "Mmm-hmmm…" he panted as he let his own hand slink down to his length, touching it just barely before Miyavi crawled over and pulled it away.<br>"No, honey, that's for me to do." Miyavi said it sternly, as if Kai had gotten into trouble, although he hadn't really. Kai obeyed and let his hands stay at his sides.  
>Miyavi wrapped his hand around the base of Kai's erection and took a few steady strokes, listening to Kai's whining and moaning. He paused, learning forward to take a breath on the tip of Kai's member and lick up Kai's shaft.<br>At this point Kai's moaning was probably audible throughout the entire flat. "Nnn….Miyavi…what are you…doing-…"  
>Miyavi was enjoying hearing Kai make all this noise, and he rewarded the other by taking Kai's length into his mouth and suckling lightly. Of course this made Kai cry out louder and so Miyavi began moving up and down, wanting to see how Kai would react.<br>Miyavi decided to add another dimension to Kai's pleasure by taking Kai's testes into his free hand and playing with them lightly. At this point, Kai was gripping the bed sheets and making noises that weren't really comprehendible. Nonetheless, they were loud, and it was what Miyavi wanted to hear.  
>Kai lied on his bed, eyes wide and body shivering from loss of contact as Miyavi pulled away. He didn't want Kai to finish like that, no…he had something else planned. Miyavi suddenly gripped Kai's thighs and pulled him forward a bit. Of course the random tug confused Kai momentarily, but when Miyavi reached over to the night stand and opened a bottle of lubricant, Kai could tell what was happening.<br>Kai watched Miyavi apply it to his own member, then without any warning other than, "Just try to relax, baby," Miyavi tried to enter Kai. Kai's eyes were closed tight and his teeth were clenched as he tried his best to grin and bear it. "It'll get better dear I promise," Miyavi purred delicately. Miyavi pushed all the way into the tightness and heat that was Kai.  
>After a couple of gentle thrusts, Miyavi gained speed. Kai was feeling way too much pain and pleasure to make much of a noise other than a throaty whimpering. Both mens' breathing became labored, and Kai would have giggled at the sound of Miyavi's hips smacking against Kai's thighs, if he had the breath to…<br>Of course, not everyone was enjoying Miyavi and Kai's first time. "Hey Reita, do me a favor babe and break those two up. Tell them to get a hotel room, they certainly have the funds to." Reita's girlfriend really didn't want to hear them getting busy.  
>Reita shrugged. "If you can deal with it once and explain your torture in excruciating detail, it could be easier to persuade them to go to Miyavi's place next time." Reita went to his room and looked in a dresser drawer for some earplugs and handed them to his girlfriend. He returned to her, holding the item out. "Maybe these will help?"<br>She smiled. "Thanks, babe." She put them on and went back to doing some cooking. Thank God for earplugs…


	10. Chapter 10

Kai woke up just after eight. It was primetime; the boys had slept through dinner, and Reita was watching "Face Off" with his girlfriend out in the living room. Of course, none of this bothered Kai; the only thing that woke him up was the fact that he was craving some sweets. Kai didn't want just any treat-he had a hankering for some zebra cakes. Now, the Little Debbie product was very hard to find in Japan, even in Tokyo, and Kai only knew one place where he could get some at this hour.  
>Resuming his usual uke way of doing things, Kai tapped Miyavi's shoulder. "Miyavi kun…mind if I go out for a bit?" Of course, Miyavi wasn't the type who like being woken up, so he just turned over and murmured "yeah, yeah" before going back to bed.<br>Kai was careful to slide out from under the covers, and it only took him a couple of minutes to get dressed before he headed out into the dark streets of Tokyo at night. With familiar streetlights to guide him, Kai walked six blocks to purchase his zebra cakes.  
>The vendor knew Kai well; the young man had come to see him about once a week, except just before tours when he would request a whole crate of the stuff to hold him over. They went through the usual transaction tonight, and Kai was smiling as he carried his eight cake box down the sidewalk.<br>He was about halfway home when it happened. TeddyLoid was heading the opposite direction, his nose poked in the first issue of Shoxx bis. He had to back order it to finish his collection; Teddy owned every issue of every Japanese-published magazine that featured Miyavi's face on the cover. Honestly, TeddyLoid's crush was a bit of a borderline obsession…  
>Teddy was gawking, drooling a bit over the beautiful musician featured on a motorcycle when he collided smack dab with Kai, knocking Kai and his box of Zebra Cakes to the pavement. Luckily for Teddy, his magazine was not damaged and he only suffered a scraped palm.<br>Teddy looked irritated for a brief moment, until he realized he had hurt this stranger. "You alright?" he asked, offering his free hand to help the other up.  
>Kai accepted Teddy's hand, and once he was on his feet again Kai grabbed his dented box of cakes. "Yeah, I'm fine." However, there was a cut on Kai's cheek that was bleeding heavily enough to not be ignored, and Teddy pulled out a napkin he had stuffed in his pocket after dinner. He handed it to Kai, and Kai's eyes enlarged. "Am I bleeding?"<br>TeddyLoid didn't want the other to worry so he said meekly, "Just a little bit." Teddy watched Kai put the napkin to his face. "Do you want me to help you home?"

Kai nodded. New company couldn't hurt anything, could it? The two began walking in the direction of Kai's place. A light breeze started up suddenly and Teddy bit his lip and furrowed his eyebrow. He knew that smell from the performances he had done as Miyavi's DJ during the world tour…the smell was dabbled with the scent of his sweat though, and Teddy didn't remember that MYV was doing a concert on this night, unless….Kai knows him personally.  
>Teddy frowned. "Do you live with anyone?" It was an odd question to ask out of the blue, but Teddy could've been asking in case he were invited inside and wanted to be ready for anyone odd Kai might be living with.<br>Kai thought for a moment. "I live with four guys and a girl, and we have two other guests over right now." Two guests assuming Kyo had crashed in Aoi's room again. Kai didn't bother to explain once he noticed Teddy's magazine out of the corner of his eye. Kai thought, "Why does he have an old issue of Shoxx? That magazine must be almost five years old." Kai was a curious being, so he decided it was best to ask. "Are you a MYV fan?"  
>Teddy's body tensed and his face twisted up as he tried to figure out how to say it. "I've worked for him before as a DJ on the world tour. My name's TeddyLoid."<br>Kai's face broke into a smile. "Oh yeah! Miyavi kun said you were doing a remix album of a bunch of his songs! I heard your demos; they're very good."  
>Teddy frowned. Kai was referring to him as Miyavi kun, not Miyavi san or Miyavi sama…apparently, Kai is close to Miyavi, closer than he was. "May I ask how you know Miyavi?"<br>Kai blushed. He wasn't sure what to say; he didn't want to say anything because he wasn't sure what would happen if the media knew about them being a couple. Kai gulped and squeaked, "Well, we're labelmates, and we spend a lot of time together." Both those sentences were true, and Teddy became quiet, so Kai figured that his answer satisfied Teddy.  
>Teddy grinned. Maybe there was nothing to fear; maybe Kai and MYV weren't a pair. Teddy knew Miyavi would date guys though; he had gone out with Maya back when Ishihara Gundan was his backup band. So it was possible for him to date a coworker again, Teddy could only hope…<br>Kai turned the key and let Teddy step in first. Teddy shuffled in nervously, he wasn't quite sure what to expect. Reita and his girlfriend stop their mid-moving making out to sit up and greet the guest.  
>"Sup?" Reita asked plainly, licking his lips and trying his best to ignore the fact that he still had his girlfriend within his reach; he could take her at any time he wanted…<br>She waved and popped out an over-eager "hello" that made Reita pout. Of course the sound of voices had Aoi, Kyo, Uruha, and Ruki all stumbling out into the living room. Teddy felt bombarded as everyone was introducing themselves. After introductions and being offered some tea, Teddy took a moment to count. There was still someone missing.  
>Miyavi wasn't mentioned at first, so Teddy figured that maybe he wasn't the other guest who was at the flat. The GazettE talked about their current projects and Reita's girlfriend mentioned something of her poetry writing, to all of which Teddy just listened patiently.<br>Uruha came over and poured Teddy some tea. "I hope you like your green tea the way I do."  
>TeddyLoid quirked up an eyebrow. "What do you mean by that?"<br>Uruha smiled, "I always add in a splash of sake."  
>"A splash?" Reita said with a chuckle, "half the damn cup is always sake when you pour it!"<br>To this everyone in the flat laughed. Teddy held the cup up to his mouth and took a sip. After the initial taste of tea had subsided, Teddy could taste the rice wine and it began to burn in his throat.  
>Kai began laughing harder. "We are giving alcohol to someone who's underage, ya know?" The rest of the GazettE looked at Teddy as if to say "oops".<br>Quite suddenly, Kai stood up and made his way toward his bedroom. "I'm gonna go check on my boyfriend." Kai's boyfriend? Teddy shook his head. Did MYV really belong to Kai? Teddy tried to wipe the thought clear from his mind, but his jaw only fell wide open as Miyavi came out of Kai's bedroom, wearing only his boxer shorts and nipping at Kai's neck playfully.


	11. Chapter 11

Teddy was standing there; eyes wide in shock. His precious MYV, the man of his dreams, was happy with someone else. Teddy's face became sorely red, and he gathered up his belongings. "I suppose I should be going now."  
>Miyavi noticed Teddy and ran over, giving him a massive hug. "Teddy! No, no, no! You can't leave now!" Mind you, Miyavi was wearing nothing except for his boxers, so his soft, exposed skin was all over Teddy.<br>Teddy's nostrils flared out slightly as he took in the scent of the other man. He smelled like heaven and nice cologne, something Teddy always loved to take in when he came in contact with MYV. Miyavi finally let go of him, backing up only a step or two. Sometimes Miyavi forgot there was such a thing as personal space.  
>"What are you doing here?" MYV asked happily, his spastic smile brightening up the room. It seemed that he could always put a smile on others' faces.<br>Teddy relaxed slightly. "I was reading something and I accidentally bumped into your…Kai."  
>Miyavi rubbed his chin. "Yes, my Kai indeed." Miyavi reached behind him and pulled Kai up next to him, embracing him in a tight hug. "…Kai, was Teddy good to you?"<br>Miyavi's boyfriend nodded. "Yeah. Did you check out his reading material?"  
>Teddy was still holding that issue of Shoxx bis in his hand when Miyavi took it from him. Teddy became embarrassed before Miyavi even took a look at it.<br>"Hmmm…" Miyavi studied the cover. "Good choice. That handsome gentleman gracing the front cover is pretty sexy looking. I'd do him any day."  
>"MYV!" Kai whined. His boyfriend could be such a narcissist sometimes.<br>Miyavi shot a glance at Kai. "Ha-ha, and that's what you were saying earlier today. You still sore?" Miyavi reached over and tried to poke Kai in the rear, but Kai turned and giggled, his cheeks turning pink. Miyavi then went on to imitate Kai. "Nnn! Ah, Miyavi kun…oh!"  
>While the rest of the GazettE was trying both to laugh and ignore what was being talked about, Teddy sat down and covered his ears with his hands. Kai took noticed and tapped Miyavi's shoulder. "Now look what you did, baby!"<p>

Miyavi took a moment to think things over before taking any action. He thought to himself, "TeddyLoid isn't usually bothered when I talk with him about sex or make jokes. Maybe he thinks Kai is gross. No, who would ever think that? Uh, who does Teddy and I usually joke about having sex? Teddy…and me. So wait…" Miyavi's mind blanked for a moment. Maybe his brain was just putting up a wall, trying to avoid the obvious answer. Miyavi finally made his conclusion. "TeddyLoid thinks I am sexy…he wants me? Yeah." Good thing Miyavi is a narcissist.  
>If this were first century Greece, pederasty would be commonplace, and Miyavi would probably already have been banging Teddy, since Teddy was considered his musical pupil, if you will. But Miyavi was in twenty-first century Tokyo, so things were much different.<br>Miyavi approached Teddy, enveloping him in another giant hug. "Aww…we're done talking like perverts, Teddy. You can take your hands off your ears now." Miyavi took Teddy's hands and held them in his own. "There you are."  
>Teddy looked up at Miyavi. The way the light above the table was shining down on him, he looked like an angel. Teddy sat upright, resting his elbows on the table.<br>After almost a full minute of silence, Kai came over to Miyavi and whispered into his ear, "You really should have more clothes on; we have company and you are parading around in your underwear."  
>To this, Miyavi snickered. "What Kai? You don't like my undies? Fine then." Miyavi bounced off to his room to get dressed.<br>While Miyavi was off changing into clothes, Kai and Teddy sat there in awkward silence. Kai wasn't an idiot; he understood what Teddy was all in a fuss about. "What's your favorite thing about my boyfriend? Is it that he's cute…because he sure is!"  
>Teddy frowned. "You're really lucky, Kai. I know that you spend time with him here at home, but I worked with him every day for a few months. He's a really hard worker and a brilliant musician. I look up to him and respect him. But he's also so very caring, and I think that's why I like him so much."<br>Of course Teddy liked the man before he'd even met him. Miyavi was his savior; his music kept Teddy focused on his goals as a professional beat-boxer. The turntables may not sound the same as the guitar, but Teddy wanted to be that wild, have that rock star status, and remain just as down to earth. Musical infatuation became lust, which in turn melded into an obsession of sorts.  
>Kai was slightly upset; something sounded wrong with Teddy's answer, like he wasn't saying exactly what was on his mind.<br>Miyavi came out of his room, having chosen to wear a simple pair of jeans and a shirt from the PSC tenth anniversary show in Budokan. It was a brand new shirt, and Miyavi loved it. He made it to the kitchen and stopped, noting a slight distress on Kai's face.  
>"What's wrong honey?" he asked sweetly. Maybe Teddy said something Kai didn't like within the two minutes Miyavi was gone.<br>Teddy took his magazine and his other belongings. "Thanks you guys," he muttered before scampering out the front door.  
>Miyavi scratched his head. "Kai what happened?"<br>Kai pouted. "He's in love with you."  
>Miyavi folded his arms and looked at Kai. "…And I'm in love with you, so it doesn't matter."<br>"Yes, it does, MYV. Kai sighed. "As long as he thinks there is the slightest hope for him, he is going to keep obsessing over you."  
>Miyavi cocked his head to the side. "Obsessing?"<br>Kai pulled out a photo holder. He had gotten into TeddyLoid's wallet and pulled it out when he wasn't looking. "Check this out."  
>There was an array of photos; concert photos, photos printed off the internet, and personal photos, but all of them were of Miyavi, every last one. And behind a few of those photos were fortune cookie slips and a slip with Miyavi's cell number on it, which Miyavi had never given Teddy that number, and little doodles of Miyavi. It was a somewhat sickening sight.<br>"I see what you mean," Miyavi said finally. Being this obsessive meant Teddy would realize this part of his wallet was missing soon. "What should we do?"  
>Kai thought about it. "I guess you should go have a talk to him, and I guess we should return this…although after talking to him, he might throw it out. Most of the time, once someone realizes their dream cannot be reality, they dispose of all evidence that they ever had that dream in the first step towards acceptance."<br>Miyavi wondered since when did Kai become a psychology professor, but he nodded. "Yeah, I guess I should go to his place. I'll be back in an hour or so." Miyavi threw on his coat. "Call me if you need anything."


	12. Chapter 12

Miyavi was tapping on the brick-red door of Teddy's apartment. It was getting late, and so Miyavi had little trouble getting tackled by fangirls on his way. As he looked out a lobby window, he could see that in typical fashion it had begun to rain. Rain seemed to follow Miyavi wherever he went, and his grandparents always told him it was the Korean in him.  
>Teddy was trying to drink himself to death, or so it seemed. He was pouring his fifth shot of Vodka when he heard a knock on the door. Paranoid that it might be the coppers and he was underage, Teddy hid the bottles and the shot glass in a cupboard before waddling to the front door. When he opened it and saw Miyavi standing there, he couldn't believe his eyes. It had to be his drunken stupor playing tricks on him, right?<br>He realized that his mind wasn't playing tricks on his as he felt the long, lanky arms of his obsession envelope around him, holding him in a sincere embrace. Teddy felt confused, but hugged back before letting him in and closing the door.  
>Miyavi took to the closest chair at the kitchen table, pulling it out and seating himself. He had smelled the vodka on the other man's breath and let out a concerned sigh before motioning for Teddy to take a seat as well.<br>Teddy had a little more trouble getting himself comfortable. At first he pulled the chair out a bit too far, and scooted up, letting the wooden legs screech gently across the linoleum floor. He gritted his teeth at the noise and found himself leaning a little too far forward, his lips almost pressing themselves across the surface of the kitchen table. Once Teddy had righted himself, he looked over to Miyavi, whom of which he was now seeing in doubles.  
>Miyavi frowned and decided to start talking. He reached out and took Teddy's hand. "You can't do this to yourself, Teddy. Look at you. You are such a talented man and you are drinking yourself down because you have a crush that you can't obtain?"<br>Teddy sniffled a bit, realizing what MYV meant. "How do you know about my love!"  
>Miyavi tried not to cry; this was a bit upsetting to him. "A crush always knows when someone nearby wants him." Of course, Miyavi was trying to be as delicate with this situation as he could; he didn't want to kill the poor guy. Still, Teddy was going a bit out of his mind.<br>A soft warble came from Teddy. "I love you, MYV."  
>At this point, Miyavi had to be strong. He held more tightly onto Teddy's hand. "I'm sorry, Teddy."<p>

As the other began crying harder, Miyavi led him to his bed and pulled back the blankets, tucking him in. "I think your mind will be more clear after a nap. I love Kai, and Kai loves me…and there is a perfectly good reason why I can't be yours…because there is someone out there for you already, someone who is much better for you than I could ever be."  
>Teddy didn't understand; nothing was going to get through his head while he was punch-drunk, and so Miyavi waited until Teddy fell asleep before tip-toeing to Teddy's kitchen to call Kai.<br>When Kai picked up, Miyavi sighed. "Teddy's asleep. I tucked him in. He was so drunk out of his mind I couldn't talk much sense into him. I'm kinda worried; I can smell vodka on his breath."  
>Kai understood. "Uun, so when are you coming home Miyavi baby?"<br>"Well, if you don't mind, I think I am going to stay and babysit him for a little while, and then try this talk over again. I might be gone for a while."  
>"It's okay, honey. Call me once in a while with an update, okay?"<br>Miyavi nodded. "Alright babe. Sleep well."  
>Miyavi hung up his cell phone. He made do by taking a nap on TeddyLoid's couch, using a small throw pillowblanket set and curling up a little so he could fit on the three cushion couch.  
>After a few hours of fitful sleep, he woke up to check on Teddy. Teddy was still out like a light, his arms wrapped around a spare pillow, and his voice whispering softly as he slept. Miyavi listened intently, and could make out a few obscene words in Teddy's quiet ranting. Odds were Teddy would wake up with a bit of morning wood. The thought made Miyavi laugh aloud…almost.<br>Back at the GazettE's flat, Kai was busy busy busy doing some housecleaning. Somehow, the place had managed to become an absolute mess. Well, maybe it wasn't really a mystery; five grown rock stars living in a flat together where only one has a girlfriend and the rest have company over all the time…There was oh so much to do!  
>It was about four AM when Kai suited up. He put on a pair of rubber gloves and his favorite pair of pajama pants. Grabbing a massive bucket of cleaning supplies, he looked from one side of the flat to the other…<p>

"How do I always get stuck doing all of the housecleaning?" he mumbled. Kai started by gathering up all of the bottles of alcohol and taking care of them properly. He dumped out all of the ash trays and looked at the slightly-yellowed walls. "Those are going to need repainting this summer."  
>He worked his busy little body away for about three hours. He stopped to take a brief rest when his ears perked up. He heard a caterwaul like someone was in a good amount of pain. A worried look striking his face, Kai made his way to the source of the noise. Putting his ear up to the door, Kai could hear noises he didn't want to coming from Reita's bedroom.<br>Kai tilted his head. "At this hour?" he asked himself quietly.  
>Making his way back to the kitchen, he prepared to make some French toast for breakfast. He knew the others would be up in a little bit…and Reita would probably say something along the lines of, "this food sucks."<br>Kai took a deep breath and tried to keep from crying. It seemed that without Miyavi's love, Kai would certainly go insane. Letting the pan warm up on the front burner, Kai took a seat at the kitchen table and wiped a tear on his shirt sleeve. He could never manage to get respect from his band mates, yet somehow, he'd managed to find love. If only he were a stronger person…


	13. Chapter 13

Aoi wandered out of his bedroom; he swore he could hear a small scoffing noise. His curiosity gained hold, but when he wandered to the kitchen and saw a very sad-looking Kai making breakfast, Aoi frowned. "What's the matter?" Aoi knew that Kai was usually on the receiving end of the band's ridiculing, but now he was beginning to feel bad about it.  
>The soft-hearted drummer flipped over the slices of French toast and prodded at a sausage link. "It's nothing."<br>"I don't believe that…" Aoi could tell that was a lie; something was bothering little Kai kun; the tears staining his face were way too revealing.  
>Aoi moved closer, placing his hand on Kai's shoulder. "You can tell me anything and I won't tell the rest of the band; I promise." He wrapped his arms around Kai's waist in a gentle, affectionate hug.<br>Kai didn't fight, but his arms didn't wrap around Aoi. However, his head leaned over onto the other's shoulder and he closed his eyes for a minute, taking in the warmth and comfort Aoi was supplying him with.  
>Kai opened his eyes when the sausage began to sizzle more loudly, and he finished preparing breakfast. Between a sniffle here and there, Kai expressed his feelings of weakness, and how much he hated spending a night apart from Miyavi.<br>Aoi smiled. "Yeah, I feel pretty lonely and detached when Kyo isn't around, but sometimes I get good sleep when he's gone. When Kyo sleeps, it sounds like he's growling. It's awful." At this Aoi giggled.  
>After a couple of minutes, Aoi and Kai woke up the rest of the household for breakfast. Hung over, grumpy-as-all-hell rock stars came filing out of their respective bedrooms, trying to make sense of the evening behind them and the morning ahead.<br>Kai dished out breakfast and sat with the rest of the band; Aoi and Kai's conversation earlier would be kept their little secret.  
>The GazettE was munching away early in the morning on their French toast and sausages, not thinking about much because no one was focused enough to. However, across town a certain residence was going through a revelation of sorts…<p>

Miyavi was preparing breakfast too, but it was more so he could clear his head and try to soften the blow of having to tell Teddy (again) that he was in love with someone else. Miyavi was going for a different style of breakfast; he was preparing eggs, bacon, toast, with orange slices and milk to drink.  
>When Miyavi could hear the uneven footsteps of TeddyLoid coming down the hall, his body tensed up and he almost whimpered audibly.<br>Teddy stumbled as he made his way to the kitchen. His body woke him up at the smell of food, but he couldn't remember having invited Miyavi over or anything. He rubbed his eyes and asked drowsily, "What are you doing here?" Of course he said it calmly; he wouldn't dare kick out the man he was madly in love with.  
>Miyavi plastered on a faint smile. "Take a seat. Breakfast is almost ready."<br>TeddyLoid was confused, but his ass obeyed immediately, plopping down onto a kitchen chair. His mind couldn't think it through to argue; he was suffering a pretty intense headache from the night before.  
>As Miyavi was dishing up the food; he remembered the night he had discovered TeddyLoid. The kid was only sixteen years old. Miyavi stumbled into a Shibuya nightclub, looking for someplace fun to dance. The music struck him right away. It was loud, commanding, and had a crazy eighties techno jive to it. TeddyLoid happened to be a guest DJ that night. He was known, but known only in Shibuya for his DJ-ing and human beat-boxing skills. As Miyavi danced and twirled to the beat, he realized he had no choice but to swoop this kid up and take him under his wing as a musical apprentice.<br>After TeddyLoid was done DJ-ing for the night and was busy packing up his gear after the club was closed, Miyavi approached him. "Hey kid. I like your style."  
>Teddy peeked up through his thick-rimmed glasses. He stopped packing and stood for a moment, slack-jawed. Teddy had been a fan of Miyavi since Due le Quartz had first emerged on the music scene, and there was no way in hell Miyavi could be standing there feeding him compliments.<br>Teddy's face paled to a snow white hue and he stuttered, "Th-thank you." Teddy finished his packing quickly, and as he was loading the equipment into his family's car to be hauled back home Miyavi followed him. Leaning against the side of the small Hyundai Miyavi smiled and offered, "How would you like to be famous?"

Of course, Miyavi couldn't see the same traits in him now. Where was the ambitious young boy that had struck Miyavi's curiosity? Teddy seemed careless, like he had given up.  
>Serving the plate of breakfast, Teddy poked at it a moment before taking his first bite. It was delicious, as Teddy would have only hoped from Miyavi. He began to pick up pace, scarfing the meal down quickly, while Miyavi was taking his time for once.<br>Once finished, Miyavi cleared the dishes and returned to the table, looking more serious. "Do remember anything from last night?"  
>Teddy shook his head.<br>"Well…you got drunk, and I took you home, and well, I didn't mean to but I found this in your wallet." He took out the photos of himself and handed them to Teddy. "You said you were in love with me, but TeddyLoid…I am in love with Kai. He's my boyfriend."  
>Teddy blinked. "I'll just wait," he said meekly.<br>Miyavi knew what the other was saying. "It isn't likely, and I am sure there is someone out there better suited for you, and a bit closer to you in age. You are aware there is almost a decade of difference in our ages; we are in different stages of our adult lives."  
>Teddy frowned. "We are only seven years apart in age. My parents are eleven years apart in age. My mother is thirty six and my father is forty seven…Seven years is nothing."<br>Miyavi laughed slightly. "Apparently it is, or else we wouldn't be arguing this point, now would we?" Miyavi stood up. "I'm sorry to have let you down so hard, but it had to be done." Miyavi briskly made his way out the door, not wanting to make any more of a mess of the situation.  
>Teddy sat still, not bothering to go after Miyavi. "One day he'll understand," Teddy whispered to himself. "One day…"<p> 


	14. Chapter 14

Miyavi made it back home in the late morning. Kai watched him with gentle curiosity. "Well, how did it go?" he asked, his chocolate brown eyes looking to Miyavi with adoration. He had genuinely missed the other man.  
>Miyavi frowned. "I don't know if he's ever been rejected before. He didn't take it well. Almost as if he expects me to leave you for him or some shit, which will never happen…"<br>"Oh God," Kai thought, "Miyavi's swearing. Today is not going to be a fun day for me at all." He slid over in front of the taller figure and wrapped his arms around the other man.  
>Miyavi smiled. "Don't worry, Kai. We just gotta be a strong couple."<br>Kai giggled. "Strong?"  
>"Yeah, strong…like the way you endured me for two hours yesterday morning."<br>Blushing, Kai backed up a few steps. "Yeah, I'm still really sore from all that, you know?"  
>Miyavi chucked. "It will hurt less when I do it to you again tomorrow night."<br>"Okay…wait-what?"  
>Aoi was in his room at this point. Kyo hadn't been returning his calls since last night, but Aoi hadn't though anything of it until now. "Where the hell is he?" It seemed something was always stressing him out, but this was more serious. Kyo never disappeared on him. Coming out from his room, Aoi ran into Uruha. "Hey Uru, wanna be my best friend?"<br>The other tilted his head. He was in the middle of enjoying his sake, and didn't particularly want to be interrupted. "What is it this time?"  
>Aoi pouted. "This time?"<br>"Yeah, seems you always want something from me. What do I have to do?"  
>Smiling, Aoi provided, "Well Kyo's run off again. Wanna help me find him?"<br>"Yeah, let me finish this glass first." Uruha chugged the rest of the cup of sake in fifteen seconds flat. "Let's go."

The boys draped on their coats, heading out the door quickly. It was a chilly day out, and so Aoi figured Kyo couldn't have gone too far…although Uruha could be wrong; his boyfriend is a masochist.  
>Uruha was stumbling a bit, but he was happy to get out and walk. The sake would burn through his system more quickly this way. Uruha was giggling the whole way through the red light district, as Aoi thought to check a certain place.<br>"This is Kuro Oni, Kyo's favorite hangout spot. He frequents this place often."  
>Uruha looked confused and slightly afraid. "What is this place?"<br>"A twenty-four hour bondage club."  
>"A what? You don't come here with him do you?"<br>Aoi grinned. "Have you ever tried it, Uruha?"  
>The blond shook his head.<br>"Ah," Aoi said with a smirk. "Too bad."  
>The pair walked into the club. It was dark, almost pitch black with neon blue hues. There scent in the air was of sex, sweat, and alcohol, tinged with smoke. The music was droning trance. Customers with awkward face piercings and tiny leather or lingerie outfits were plentiful. Just the image of this place was creeping Uruha out.<br>"Can we leave now? I don't see him."  
>"Wait, Uruha, I need to ask the owner."<br>Uruha pouted, but followed Aoi to the bar. "Hey, Kiyoharu, how goes it?"  
>The shirtless, tattooed bartenderowner leaned forward. "I'm fine. But where's Kyo? And who's this? You're not having an affair are you?"  
>Aoi frowned. "Of course not. This is my best friend Uruha. And we actually dropped by because we're looking for Kyo."<br>"Oh," Kiyoharu sighed. He looked over at the empty cage in the corner. "He hasn't been here since you last brought him. On another note, that blond, stumbling friend you have with you, if he needs to make some side money, we need a new dancer for that cage. Our last one made over ¥19,500,000 this year, and left to finish college."

Uruha pouted. "No way in hell I will dance for your horny ass!"  
>Kiyoharu chuckled. "Well, if you won't do that, at least feel free to come by for a drink once in a while. Any friend of Aoi and Kyo is welcome here."<br>To this Uruha just snorted. If he could remember it when he was sober, maybe he'd come by for some booze.  
>The two made their way back out of the club. The next spot to check would be Kyo's favorite café, a small hole-in-the-wall that Kyo would crawl off to when he needed to think. The main entrance was in the center of an alleyway, and when they entered it, they saw only three customers there, none of them being Kyo. Aoi turned around, sighing. When they made it outside, Uruha's face turned to a frown.<br>"Why are you crying?" Uruha couldn't understand it. Maybe Kyo just wanted some alone time or he ran off to buy Aoi a present. "If there's something wrong Kyo will get in contact with you."  
>"Are you sure?" Aoi asked, sobbing.<br>Uruha wiped a tear from Aoi's eyes. "Yes, I am certain."  
>"Okay…thank you." Aoi wasn't even looking at Uruha.<br>"You'll be just fine." Uruha wrapped him into a tight hug, kissing the other man's forehead, trying to bring comfort to his best friend.  
>"I'll be fine," Aoi whispered, backing away and taking off back to the flat, leaving a drunken Uruha alone in the alley.<br>"What a great best friend he is," Uruha thought dryly.  
>When Aoi made it back home, he realized he had left his cell phone on his bed. There were fifty-two missed calls. Aoi checked it. None of the calls were from Kyo; all of them were from Uruha. "What does he want now?" There was a message, and so Aoi decided to at least listen to it. And he was glad he did.<br>Putting his shoes back on, Aoi ran out the door. What the hell did he leave Uruha outside by himself for?


	15. Chapter 15

Everything was a blur, well maybe it was a compilation of smaller blurs, all coming together to make a swirling mix of…Uruha couldn't tell what he was seeing. The colors were brown, black, and various shades of grey, and there was an unidentifiable blob. It was coming closer, moving toward him. "Awake?" the blob asked. It wasn't the voice of anyone he recognized. Uruha tried to reply, but all he could muster up through his lungs, which felt so heavy, was a pathetic, "Uhnnnn~".  
>"Don't worry; it will wear off soon, and you will feel just like before. Well, except for any pain or soreness will be amplified tenfold. You can tolerate that though, right?"<br>Uruha was confused. What the hell happened? He could remember being in the alley with Aoi, and Aoi leaving. A man came stopped his car and offered the drunken Uruha a ride home. What was his name? He remembered trying to call Aoi, over and over since that was all his drunken mind could think of. He finally left a message because at a stop light a bunch of Yakuza had shot at the tires and then grabbed both men out of the car, injecting them with a sedative and carrying them away.  
>As his vision slowly began to improve, he could see the other captive lying on a metal table a few feet away. Uruha finally remembered his name, Asagi. Asagi was a few years older than Uruha, he could tell that. He had long black hair that brushed past his shoulders, and black, narrow eyes that reflected his intelligence. Unfortunately, neither man had the physical strength to fight of a gang of eight Yakuza members.<br>Masato was in the front of the room, sitting in a chair, watching the victims wake up. "We are going to get a pretty amount of money for you two, especially you, blondie. Your little boyfriend said he'd cough up the ¥5,000,000 for your release. Hope he doesn't mind you being a little damaged."  
>Uruha looked down at his body. He could see some dried, blackened blood caked on his outfit, and there was some bruising already beginning to set in, leaving his naturally milky, smooth skin discolored and sensitive. Uruha wanted to say something back, or to get up and kick the Yakuza member, but his body was still invariably weak from the sedative.<br>Again, Masato decided to speak. "Actually, we were going to play with you some more, but we promised your boy toy we'd return you safely, and Yakuza never break their promise."  
>"Whu~" was all Uruha could muster, leaning his head so that he could look at Asagi, who happened to appear in much worse shape than himself.<br>Just then, a loud creak could be heard as the steel door to the room slid open, and Takeru entered. "It's my turn to watch them now, Masato. Go have lunch."  
>Masato obliged, and Takeru walked over to Uruha. "Before we got in contact with your savior, I had a bit of fun with you, I hope you don't mind. You just looked so much more youthful and delicious than that other guy over there. We haven't found anyone that will pay for his ransom yet, and if it keeps looking that way, he will become useless to us, and we may have to kill him."<br>Asagi was still barely conscious, and probably couldn't even comprehend the conversation taking place a few feet away from him. It hurt Uruha to think that somehow he was responsible for all of this happening, and that he owed the other man his life. The sedative was wearing off now, and Uruha made his first coherent sentence. "I pay for it…when I get out?"  
>Takeru smiled. "Money is money. Is this guy a friend of yours?"<br>"No." Uruha replied flatly. "Stranger. Offered to give me a ride home."  
>"Oh-oh," Takeru replied with a sinister chuckle. "So sad that you brought him into this mess, isn't it? Or maybe he brought you into it. Was he heading this way in the first place?" Since Uruha couldn't move that much still, Takeru picked up the blonde's hand and took the other's index finger, drawing it into his mouth and suckling lightly, removing the dried blood.<br>Uruha was too weak to fight it, and if it would keep Takeru from doing much else, Uruha would put up with it. Takeru began speaking again, and Uruha had nothing better to do being immobilized and waiting for Aoi, so he listened. "Too bad we had to meet under such circumstances; you really are beautiful, you know? And that boy toy of yours…"  
>"He's not my boy toy. Just best friend. My boy toy is on vacation." Well, he had to lie…he certainly didn't want this guy to ask him out; Yakuza most certainly weren't his type.<br>There was a knock on the steel door, and Chiyu entered. "Hey Masato, I know this is a little random, but do you know where I put the light red sticky notes."  
>Takeru laughed. "You mean the hot pink sticky notes?"<br>Chiyu pouted.  
>"They're on my desk, actually. I used them last night to label some files. My apologies. I meant to return them, I swear." Takeru held up his left hand and placed his right hand on his heart, taking some kind of playful oath.<br>"Whatever." Chiyu said before walking out of the room.  
>Takeru looked back down to the blond. "That was my boyfriend? You like him alright? He was so mad at me earlier for spending time with you earlier, defiling your unconscious body really irked him for some reason."<br>Uruha's cheeks reddened; he became both flustered and angered, wondering what exactly happened. "How far?"  
>Takeru shrugged, although his answer was somewhat definitive. "Just some fooling around. I wouldn't dare take anything so precious to you." It was easy for Takeru to tell, it always had been, when someone was saving themselves. As a respected Yakuza member, he only engaged in actual intercourse with hookers or people with very active reputations. The rest, to him, was open and completely game.<br>Running, running, running. Aoi was out of breath by the time he'd made it to the warehouse by the pier. "What kind of Yakuza puts their headquarters so close to the world's largest fish market?" An amused smirk came and left quickly, as Aoi found the door wasn't locked. They were expecting him.  
>Aoi had stopped at the bank on the way to and got the ¥5,000,000 given to him, in cash. Being a well-known guitarist made it easier, and when asked how he would be spending it, he replied he was buying a new house, and this was the twenty percent down. What a good liar he was.<br>The main room of the warehouse was empty, except for a man sitting at a small table, eating his lunch. "You here for blondie?"  
>"Uh, yeah…" Aoi replied. "I have the cash right here." He set the briefcase down on the table in front of Masato. The man smiled, opening the case and inspecting the money. He ran the bills through a counter in the back corner of the room-twice.<br>Once satisfied with it, he turned to the brunette. "Follow me."


	16. Chapter 16

Uruha was released to Aoi, completely unscathed except for the damages given to him before Aoi's desperate, pleading phone call. Aoi promised Uruha that, no matter how drunk Uruha gets, Aoi would never leave him alone like that again. The next night, Kyo did return to the GazettE's flat, having gone to Mie ken to visit with Aoi's mother without asking his permission, which pissed Aoi off, but he got over it. Later that week, Aoi, Kyo, and Uruha all returned to Kuro Oni. Kiyoharu treated the three of them to a drink on the house, and once again tried to offer Uruha the dancer job, but even a smashed Uruha would not accept his offer. This amused both Aoi and Kyo to no end.

Miyavi and Kai continued to have a fruitful relationship for many years. It was always the little things they did for each other to bring a smile to each other's faces that seemed to warm the hearts of everyone around them.  
>During one particular incident, Reita's girl was in the room, and she witnessed Kai sitting on Miyavi's lap, snuggling into Miyavi's chest and making a soft cooing noise. Miyavi wrapped his lanky arms around Kai and cuddled back. "Aishiteru," the pair whispered to each other.<br>In fact, during Reita's wedding, when the bouquet toss was done, it had flown over the heads of meager young women hoping for love and landed square in Kai's lap. He held it up, his face flushed with embarrassment, and stuttered, "I think you are mistaken." But this only made the women at the wedding cheer. Kai scratched his head in confusion.

TeddyLoid was standing outside of a club, someplace he had never been to before. The name of the place was Candy Dive. He didn't quite understand it, but he figured it would be a place he was welcome at, seeing as how colorful the neon sign was outside of the club. He wandered in, his eyes widening at the sights and sounds. Although many of the dancers down on the floor looked intriguing, what most caught his eye was the DJ. It would be natural for him to take notice of that, being a DJ himself, but this man up on the platform, mixing heavy beats that truly commanded those below him on the floor to move…This man was a God.  
>There weren't many DJs left on this planet who could create beats more danceable than those forged by the hands of TeddyLoid, but this man, hidden beneath a 1970's gold and white disco suit, over-sized sunglasses, and a soft harpo wig, was putting TeddyLoid's entire career to shame.<br>The young DJ pushed through the crowd, stopping only once he was directly in front of this DJ's platform. It was here, moving to the charismatic beats produced by DJ OZMA, that TeddyLoid truly fell in love for the first time-and was to be loved in return.

No matter who becomes afflicted with lovesickness, it becomes apparent that one of the main symptoms is to go a little mad. And even so, when asked why a love-stricken person has taken a misunderstood or illogical course of action, more oft then not their reply will be, "Aishiteru Kara".


End file.
